stop dreaming, fatties

Why do some fatties think they have a chance at being a major model? After watching an episode of the new season of America’s Next Top Model and a rerun of one of the earlier episodes of Janice Dickinson’s Modeling Agency, it astounds me the number of overweights who think they have a bleeding chance. I know. I should stop watching these garbage. I don’t even like ANTM that much. The show is mindnumbingly stupid half the time. You get the usual token bitch in the bunch, normally black (eg Monique, Eva, Robin) although in the newest installment the culprit is white (Renee). You get the cry baby, (eg Brooke in the seventh cycle) and there’s the token “heavy” girl, sometimes Tyra throw two in of them. The rest is made up by the usual waifish and typical skinny girls and former fatties who spent their childhood dreaming about breaking into the industry although half of them are normally too old to start anyway by the time they make the final stage. You can excuse these kinds for wanting to be fashion models despite their shortcomings although i simply cannot stomach the idea of seeing a heavyset girl modeling haute couture in magazines, or modeling clothings meant for “normally built” people of any kind.

Despite repeated proclamations by Tyra Banks of how much she likes “plus size”models, I cannot help but think it’s simply a ruse by her to get some variations in the finalist lineup for her show. We’re not even talking the average-build girl who might not be fat but do not typically conform to the conventional skinny-model built either. We are discussing literally really fleshy girls who aren’t exactly obese but clearly on the heavy side. When was the last time any of us saw these girls walk down a runway for a major fashion label or being featured in a spread in a major fashion magazine.

It’s cruel for Tyra string along these heavy girls into thinking they have even the slightest glimmer of chance at winning her competition. They are invariably booted out in the middle of the series, often for the most ridiculous reason of “losing their personality spark”. So were they really chosen to make the final for their “personality”? I thought the entire point of being a model hinges on the ability to take good photos and having a memorable runway walk? They have always booted those with great personality (eg Megg and Brooke in cycle 7) for their mediocre pictures. So even with sparkling personality models are expected to produce good photos which is the raison d’etre of their very existence. Having the most bubbly personality in the history of the world clearly would not take them very far. And if this is the very reason why they were taken in in the first place, is it not the same as losing before the race even starts?

The heavy girls also seem to have to deal with the added anxiety of worrying about not having anything on the rack of the photoshoot set that would fit them. This appears to be a very common gripe voiced by these heavyset model wannabes. They do not have the same kind of options available to them as their skinnier counterparts and would have to be happy with whatever’s at hand. This makes Tyra’s noble claim of wanting to have a plus sized america’s top supermodel even more suspect. She clearly does not give as much thought to the fatties as she does for the skinnies. If she’s really a fair judge of what makes a top model and genuinely thinks the fatties have as much chance as the skinnies of making it, she will have the same number of plus sized clothes for them to wear during their photoshoot as their competitors. This exact situation faced by fat model wannabes simply back my assertion that there’s very little chance of them making it in the mainstream fashion industry.

It’s amazing how delusional some people are. Of course, Tyra Banks in spite of the hideous lies she told in front of millions around the world cannot be held solely responsible for the farce that goes on in her show. You get poor overweights coming in with the high hopes of becoming the first fattie to win the contest when the reality is, it is almost certain that it is never going to happen. During the whole course of the competition they will be swimming against the current and inevitably be tired out and be carried off on their fleshy booties out the door. The only way to stop the madness is to get your head out of the clouds if you are not of the typical model size. Tyra who is quickly becoming a whale herself also needs to realise she is doing a disservice to the millions by making the viewers think there is indeed very little room for the niche fat model market and admit the cold ugly truth that the world will never see a fat model being mentioned in the same breath as Cindy Crawford. Naomi Campbell and the like.

why are all female maccas servers such cunts?

is it me? or are they really quite nasty creatures? i almost instinctively avoid dealing with them when i go to mcdonald’s.  i love maccas. i love their food. i love the atmosphere of their restaurants. i know how cringeworthy that just sounded. i must have given you the impression that i’m a pimple-faced porcine glutton. i’m actually none of that. granted, morgan spurlock manage to keep me off maccas for a few months after  watching his film. the allure of the golden arches proved to be too tempting to resist. upon reflection, i’m not sure if spurlock’s film was any more of a

documentary than Borat The Movie. anyhow, i’ve digressed enough. shall we proceed with the point of the post.

not 3 hours ago i was at a 24hour mcdonalds (how i love those) for a little snack as we were a bit peckish. the place was oddly packed, and at 11pm there was a kid’s birthday party taking place so the place was overrun with rowdy kids. only two counters were open to serve the crowd. the queue to the counter with the

male server was longer so we joined the slightly shorter queue for the female one. came our

turn to place our order, the cunt at the till did not greet us. i wouldn’t have minded the lack

pleasantries had she not given us the feeling that we just completely interrupted her peace. well , i guess whatever no biggie. we placed our order and i had a medium double cheese burger meal set and a choc sundae. when the sundae came, the cup was only have full. annoyed at the apparent attempt at pulling a fast one on me, i politely pointed this out to her, not wanting to offend anyone, or making a scene. of course , she obliged, but not before pulling her face in protest and stomping off the sundae machine to top it up. we saw her pumping the chocolate good with such angst we were taken aback by her reaction. just made us wonder how big a request we just made. as she came back, still sulky and stropped out she slammed the cup on the counter as if to say “take your fucking sundae and fuck off”. me and my sister just exchanged perplexed glances and coughed up the total showed on the til.

this is a very typical experience when dealing with these wretches. it’s extremely rare to

receive such an appalling service from a male server. this  might sound rather sexist but i’m just speaking from my experience. the ones who normally fill only half your cup or fries sleeve are normally women and not to mention a big serving of attitude. why do they ever work at these establishments if they find it to be so draining ? it’s probably got to do with their cyclical reproductive functions that affect their hormonal balances. or perhaps they feel they are too good for the job but forced into it by their circumstances? whatever it is, i often find their performance on their jobs well below their

male counterparts. i cannot see why they would so flagrantly skimp on fries or sundae when the guys have no trouble filling them to capacity.  could this be a justification for the pay-gap between genders in their jobs? as politically incrrect it might sound, it does seem like men perform better on their jobs

compared to their female peers. perhaps the business world secretly acknowledge this by

rewarding their male employees a certain percentage better. i very much doubt this to be the case as far as maccas servers go but if my experience mirrors a wider reality, i see no reason to pay women as much as men. the politically correct theory goes that women and men both with the same position performing the same duties ought to result in the same outcome. but if experience is anything to go by, the executions of the aforementioned duties are starkly different between genders therefore the higher pay should go to the ones who give the customers a less distressing time ie the men. lazy maccas cunts will continue to rely on their bra burning lesbian sisters calling for

“equality” in pay when they are both clearly not doing the exact same things.

this is i realise a gross generalisation. perhaps i extrapolated my experience a bit too far as to call for a justification for the pay gap. this is a rant pent up in me for years and years and years of being irritated at mcdonald’s. the common denominator of these events seem to be the gender of the server. i suppose i’m just allowing these little things to get the better of me.

Awwwww…..

Eternal embrace? Couple still hugging 5,000 years on

Tue Feb 6, 1:28 PM ET

ROME (Reuters) - Call it the eternal embrace. ADVERTISEMENT

Archaeologists in Italy have discovered a couple buried 5,000 to 6,000 years ago, hugging each other.

“It’s an extraordinary case,” said Elena Menotti, who led the team on their dig near the northern city of Mantova.

“There has not been a double burial found in the Neolithic period, much less two people hugging — and they really are hugging.”

Menotti said she believed the two, almost certainly a man and a woman although that needs to be confirmed, died young because their teeth were mostly intact and not worn down.

“I must say that when we discovered it, we all became very excited. I’ve been doing this job for 25 years. I’ve done digs at Pompeii, all the famous sites,” she told Reuters.

“But I’ve never been so moved because this is the discovery of something special.”

A laboratory will now try to determine the couple’s age at the time of death and how long they had been buried.

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Good to know i’m not completely bereft of any sense of romance. It made me smile.

Fancy a pair?

http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2007/02/01/1169919443857.html

Smells and gels swell breasts on boys

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February 1, 2007 - 10:58AM
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The lavender and tea tree oils found in some soaps, shampoos, hair gels and body lotions can produce enlarged breasts in boys, researchers reported today.

These plant oils were linked to abnormal breast development in three boys, which was reversed when they stopped using them, Dr Clifford Bloch of Pediatric Endocrine Associates in Greenwood Village, Colorado, and colleagues reported.

They said their study, published in today’s issue of the New England Journal of Medicine, suggested these oils can act in ways similar to the hormone oestrogen.

“This report raises an issue of concern, since lavender oil and tea tree oil are sold over the counter in their ‘pure’ form and are present in an increasing number of commercial products, including shampoos, hair gels, soaps, and body lotions,” the researchers wrote.

“Whether the oils elicit similar endocrine-disrupting effects in prepubertal girls, adolescent girls, or women is unknown.”

While it is very common for boys to develop temporary breast enlargement as they go through puberty, the condition is very uncommon in young boys, Bloch’s team wrote.

They found the problem in three otherwise healthy boys - ages four, seven and 10.

“I got wind of it because I was given a clue by a patient,” Bloch said.

That case involved the four-year-old “who was using absolutely nothing on his skin except a lavender oil preparation that his mother had obtained from a homeopath.

She used to rub it on his chest and body every night” because lavender, in alternative medicine circles, is supposed to have healing properties.

Several months after the boy stopped getting the “healing balm,” his breasts returned to normal.

Meanwhile, Bloch then began to see lavender crop up in other cases, including the 10-year-old, who was using a hair styling gel and shampoo that contained both lavender oil and tea tree oil, and the seven-year-old, who had been using lavender-scented soap and skin lotions.

In laboratory tests, scientists at the National Institute of Environmental Health Sciences in North Carolina found that both substances can mimic the action of the female hormone oestrogen and block male hormones that control both masculine characteristics and inhibit the growth of breast tissue.

Reuters

Lovely. If you’re male and repulsive enough in some way insofar as all hope of of touching a boob is lost, lavender oil might be a solution. get your own and you’ll never go without.

big brother bollocks

i realise this is old, especially with how quickly people forget about things these days. it’s all pretty much over and done with. shilpa’s won, the adulation and fame throughout the UK. with that comes lucrative contract offers for telly appearances and product endorsements. all this on top of the 250k quid prizemoney, which for shilpa, being from india, if judiciously managed will last her a lifetime. jade and her sidekicks, jo and dani, in true pikey fashion, resorted to bullying and taunts with racist undertones to take out their jealousy for shilpa. i believe it began as normal girly rivalry that took a bitter turn with time. it just proves how venomous women can be between themselves. the like-minded gang up, in this case, chavettes jade, jo and danielle and zero in on a prey and shilpa was the obvious choice, being foreign and posessing all the traits her antagonists could only dream of, class and effortless pulchritude (ooohh big word) , all the classic characteristics the english underclass bullies look for in their victims. what perplex me is jo’s initial refusal to apologise for her behaviour vehemently stating she never did anything wrong. her response to  racism accusation, apart from the obvious denial, was a story of her cousin’s choice to marry an indian, a union which has resulted in indian members in her immediate family. this in her mind apparently makes her a non-racist. granted, she has finally relented to pressures and very recently apologised for her on-screen excesses. her initial unwillingness to apologise before she realises the full extent of the consequences

rendered her apology moot and disingenuous, something that stemmed from her fear for her life and career rather than genuine repentance. her appearance as a bawling woman of diminished sanity however has lead me to rethink my own reaction towards her, and made me wonder if the world needs to stop dogging her.

Jade, who’s also since been consigned to the loony bin has spared no opportunity to repair her torn reputation. the woman has done everything from ordering chicken tikka for dinner to planning a trip to india in the near future in her bid to sooth her conscience and salve her inflammed image thanks to scalding public criticism. indians who are bemused by her decision to take up an invitation

to visit their country were less than welcoming in their reaction upon learning of ms goody’s plan. the indian high commission in fact were accused of dragging their heels in issuing her tourist visa, citing security risk that goody’s attracted herself. they insisted they have treated her application as they do any other and has not seen any reason to afford her any special treatment.  goody’s doctors have issued her warnings against travelling to india due to concerns over her mental wellbeing. she has since been released from the the clinic where she admitted herself into, although the doctors still require her to report herself twice a week for observational purposes and further treatment.

another culprit in the middle of the furore, is the silly tart of a non-entity, danielle lloyd, whose miss great britain title was taken away after being discovered

gloating in a magazine about the presents her then-boyfriend showered her with, who turned out to be one of the judges in the beauty contest

she won. her big bruv antics not only caused her to lose lucrative modelling contracts, one with a motorcycle insurance company, but also the celebrity boyfriend to whom all her accomplishments could be attributed to. it remains unclear what the future holds for her, which is looking a lot dimmer post-big bruv.  she is less adamant to defend her ways and and apologised earlier to her victim

shortly before getting evicted from the the house. currently baking in the arabian sun in

dubai, she has received less flak compared to the gangleader goody and therefore has managed to maintained her sanity amid the outcry.

i am inclined to call for these three to be  consigned to an indian slum, but being the being the softie that i am, the public tears shed have moved me to a more forgiving mood. it is debatable whether or not they were of a crocodile, but while it is important to send a tough anti racism message across to the people, it is also just as important to not degrade outselves to the level of

the people we have come to loath.

microsoft windows vista?

does look very appealing, although the built-in video-quality-reducing mechanism turns me off immensely. why do they care? do they even make films? it baffles me how much these wankers want to dictate what we can and cannot do with our machines. granted, i will not be switching over in the foreseeable future, not least because my creaky laptop can barely run XP as it is. i also have no plans to purchase a new machine beefy enough in specs to run a half decent version of vista. which reminds me, they do come in an array of versions ranging from super basic all the way up to the platinum one if you like. i can’t claim to know what the differences are between them but apparently the most basic version doesn’t do entertainment stuff? isn’t that kind of retarded? anyhow. i saw a review of it on Click, and to be honest, apart from flashy graphics, and saving you a couple of clicks to go to the desired destination on the computer, it doesn’t do a whole lot. or rather, i don’t need a whole lot more. XP serves me just fine. ok, so they claim it’s safer, i guess that’s good, but really what security threats am i attracting? more stable? yes, i could do with a computer that crashes a bit less. translucent window panes? i’ll pass. ”gadgets”? i have a couple of yahoo widgets, and i don’t use them a whole lot, so i’ll pass, side bar with a tiny slideshow going? a bit pointless, in my view, so i’ll pass on that as well. the thingy the windows do  when they parade on the screen? hmm, i don’t know how that will be of any good to me, so i’ll pass on that as well. i guess i’m just an old fuddy duddy who likes his things simple. or more likely, i will learn to love it when i have it. god knows when that will be. but really, the newest “upgrades” aren’t necessarily always the best way to go. case in point? internet explorer 7. it keeps crashing on me. lord knows why. IE 6 is better by a mile, even without the tabs. oh well i guess it doesn’t matter.

CUZ MY NEXT MACHINE SHALL BE A MAC. SUCK ON THAT, BITCHES.

whoa

another pointless blog that shall be abandoned after 3 posts has surfaced. run for cover. although im baffled as to why the benevolent people at wordpress.com did not give me an option to have my own password. i really can’t be arsed to remember a random piece of letter/digit combination.